A detailed guide to this IELTS Writing Task 2 essay type, with structure templates, useful vocabulary, and techniques to achieve Band 7+.
Originally published April 2018. Last reviewed 3 July 2026.
In this post, we will look at a positive/negative essay example from the IELTS writing task 2 test. Students often ask if the questions are repeated year after year and the answer is no, but the topics are. There are so many questions written each year, you may find your practice answering various questions on different topics. For example, you could write essays to answer questions about education or the environment, which benefits you because you learn vocabulary associated with those topics and develop ideas that can help you in your writing test.
Practising writing IELTS task 2 essays on a range of topics is a great way to learn new vocabulary for those topics, but also to practice your essay structures. You begin to develop your ideas around those topics, thinking of examples and giving your opinions.
If you would like to learn how to structure a positive/negative essay please click the button below >
Businesses devote millions every year to online commercials, print ads and posters. These advertisements can influence the public to purchase products that they don’t need in their lives. Firstly, this essay will discuss the main positive aspect of businesses doing well and secondly the primary negative effect of impulsive purchases.
On the one hand, the law of supply and demand is perhaps one of the most fundamental concepts of economics and it is the backbone of the market economy. The higher the demand means the greater the supply and on top of that it can provide employment to a lot of people. Furthermore, this helps in the improvement of the economy of a country becauseof its massive tax revenues. For instance, an article from Business Mirror China in 2016 revealed that 90% of Chinese job seekers had landed jobs provided by mobile companies while it increased their gross domestic product.
On the other hand, persuasive commercials can initiate impulsive buying. This is the tendency for a customer to buy goods and services without planning in advance, as a consumer takes such a buying decision in the spur of the moment, it is triggered by emotions and feelings and more often than not they would usually end up having a lot of debts. This is because they would use their credit cards or submit themselves to loan sharks just to buy the products that they thought they needed. For example, a study by Metrobank Philippines in 2016 discovered that 90% of credit card loaners who weren’t able to pay their monthly dues came from online shoppers.
In conclusion, consumerism may have obvious positive aspects like employment for some people, however having a large number of debts because of impulsive buying is a bigger problem because people will need to pay not only for the price of the product but the added interest as well.
(Word count – 314 / Band score 8)
Task Achievement – The essay provides an answer to the question asked, supported by relevant examples.
Coherence and Cohesion – The answer has been divided into clear logical paragraphs and each main body paragraph only has one main idea. There are cohesive links between the main body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource – There is evidence of a wide range of vocabulary, with no errors in the text.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy – The answer has no grammatical errors. The sentences have a wide range of structures.
We hope you found this post useful in helping you to study for the IELTS Test. If you have any questions please let us know in the comments below or on the Facebook page.
The best way to keep up to date with posts like this is to like us on Facebook, then follow us on Instagram and Pinterest.
If you need help preparing for the IELTS Test, join the IELTS Achieve Academy and see how we can assist you to achieve your desired band score. We offer an essay correction service, mock exams and online courses.
A detailed guide to this IELTS Writing Task 2 essay type, with structure templates, useful vocabulary, and techniques to achieve Band 7+.
Originally published December 2017. Last reviewed 3 July 2026.
In writing task 2 you will be asked to write a discursive essay (250 words minimum). You will be given a question asking you to give your opinion, discuss a problem or issue. You could also be asked to provide solutions, evaluate a problem, compare and contrast different ideas or challenge an idea. In this post, we will be focussing on how to write a cause/effect essay.
One of the first things you should do is read the marking criteria to see what the examiners expect. This is really important, as you need to know what they are looking for in the band 7+ boxes.
You should be able to give the examiners exactly what they want, in order to get a 7+ band score.
If you would like to purchase a 30 page PDF download that is easy to read and print out please take a look at the bookshop >
WRITING TASK 2 Cause/Effect STRUCTURE
The structure that I advise my students to use, will be sure to get you a band score 7+. You need to practice using this structure, with as many questions as you can, before sitting your IELTS test. This writing task 2 structure has been proven to be successful for my students and when perfected, can easily help you to achieve a high band score.
TIP >> Before you start writing, plan your ideas so that you can organise the information clearly. You must decide what you think is the main cause and what the specific effects are. Take 5 minutes and plan out your ideas and examples.
TIP >> It is very important that spend a full 40 minutes on this task as the score you get for writing task 2 is two-thirds of your total writing score. You also need to write a minimum of 250 words and use your own ideas.
TIP >> Remember to write in a formal tone, this is an academic essay, therefore your writing should be formal.
This is one possible way to structure your essay;
IT IS A 4-PARAGRAPH STRUCTURE >>
Paragraph 1 – The Introduction
This is the introduction to the essay and where you should start off by paraphrasing the question.
Do you understand what I mean, when I say ‘paraphrase’ the question?
This means that you rewrite the question in your own words using synonyms. You can’t just copy the question again or use the same words in the question. Paraphrase and show off your vocabulary knowledge by using synonyms. When practising your essay writing, use an online thesaurus to help you. This is a great tool and can help you to learn many new words.
Then your next sentence should introduce the essay, this will tellthe examiner exactly what you will discuss in the main body paragraphs. For example, Firstly this essay will discuss……… Secondly this essay will discuss…….
There are two sentences you need in the introduction >>
Paraphrase the question
Introduce the specific topics that will be discussed in the main body paragraphs.
Paragraph 2 – Main Body Paragraph 1
In this paragraph, you should describe a specific cause.
Start the paragraph by introducing the cause. This is where you need to have a topic sentence. The next sentence(s) should explain the cause, going into detail. The third sentence should give an example that supports.
The example you give could be something from your own experience or made up – it is ok to make up something as the examiners will not fact check your information. They want to see your ability to use English at a certain level. You could make up an example from a report, journal, newspaper or University study.
This is how the paragraph should look >>
Introduce the cause (topic sentence)
Explain/give detail
Example
Paragraph 3 – Main Body Paragraph 2
In this paragraph, you should write about the effect.
Start the paragraph by introducing the effect. This is where you need to have a topic sentence. The next sentence(s) should explain the effect, going into detail. The third sentence should give an example.
The example you give could be something from your own experience or made up – it is ok to make up something as the examiners will not fact check your information. They want to see your ability to use English at a certain level. You could make up an example from a report, journal, newspaper or University study.
This is how the paragraph should look >>
Introduce the effect (topic sentence)
Explain/give detail
Example
If you would like to purchase a 30 page PDF download that is easy to read and print out please take a look at the bookshop >
Paragraph 4 – The Conclusion
In the fourth paragraph, you write the conclusion giving a summary of your main points and say what you think is most important about this topic and give a recommendation. You should not enter any new information or ideas in this paragraph.
Summary of the main points
What you think is most important about this topic / give a recommendation
Another possible way to structure your cause/effect essay is this;
Introduction
Cause 1 – Describe a specific cause
Cause 2 – Describe another specific cause
Effects – Describe the effects from both causes
Conclusion
SAMPLE Cause/Effect ESSAY >>
**All questions have been reported by students who have taken the IELTS exam.**
In many countries all over the world today, there are many people who are extremely overweight. This essay will firstly discuss the main reasons that this is happening and secondly look at the effects this is having on individuals and society.
Firstly, obesity is caused by many factors in modern society, including the easy availability of unhealthy food. When a bad diet is matched with a sedentary lifestyle, weight gain is inevitable, since eating large portions of food that is mainly processed, high in salt, sugar and filled with chemicals, the body gains weight fast. For example, a documentary by Channel 4 in 2016 showed that the most obese populations were situated in underdeveloped nations, like Venezuela, where people admitted to finding it difficult to eat a balanced and healthy diet and had no nutritional education.
Secondly, the effect that immense weight gain can have on a person, is that they will likely develop health issues, like diabetes or heart disease. As the body becomes larger, the metabolism slows down, so that the body is more likely to get a chronic illness. This is impacting on health services around the world, as hospitals are seeing an increased demand to care for obese patients. For instance, The NHS in the UK has admitted to spending around 16 billion per year on obese related diseases like diabetes. UK newspaper The Telegraph reported in 2016 that more money is spent on treating obesity in the UK than on staffing the police force and fire service.
In conclusion, obesity is being caused by easily available calorie-rich processed food and little exercise. The effects of this are impacting individuals health as well as the cost of national healthcare services. In order for obesity to be lessened, individuals should be educated about nutrition, furthermore, the governments should implement higher taxes on all junk food and sugar.
(Word Count – 310 / Band Score 9)
Task Achievement – The answer provides a paraphrased question, to begin with, followed by a relevant cause and effects. Both the cause and effects are fully supported (relevant examples are given) in the main body paragraphs in the essay, with fully extended and well-supported ideas. the style of the writing is appropriate for an academic essay.
Coherence and Cohesion – The answer has been divided into clear logical paragraphs and each main body paragraph only has one main idea. There are cohesive links between the main body paragraphs and between most sentences. Examples are highlighted with discourse markers like – for example, and for instance. The conclusion gives a clear recommendation, which is linked to the information in the main body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource – There is evidence of a wide range of vocabulary, with no errors in the text.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy – The answer has no grammatical errors. The sentences have a wide range of structures.
TIP >> Remember to give both a cause and effect. Use each of the main body paragraphs to support your ideas, giving examples that are relevant. In the conclusion, summarise your main points and say what is important about the topic/give a recommendation.
WRITING TASK 2 BAND SCORE 9 CRITERIA >>
If you would like to view more high band score cause and effect essay examples please click the button below >
We hope you found this post helpful in helping you to study for the IELTS Test. Let us know in the comments or on the Facebook page if you have any questions. The best way to keep up to date with posts like this is to like us on Facebook, and then follow us onInstagramand Pinterest. We offer essay correction services, mock exams, and online courses. If you need help preparing for the IELTS Test, join the IELTS Achieve Academy and see how we can help you achieve your desired band score faster.
Step-by-step guide to answering this type of IELTS Writing Task 1 question. Covers structure, key language, and band-scoring criteria.
Originally published December 2017. Last reviewed 3 July 2026.
In this post, we will look at the word count needed in the writing tasks. You should know that 250 words are the minimum for a writing task 2 essay and 150 words are minimal for writing task 1. If you write less than the word counts specified in the question, you will lose marks in task achievement, because you will not have completed one of the requirements for the task.
The examiner will count your words to check that you have the minimum word count. If you have not reached 250 and have, for example, 240 words they will mark your essay lower because of this. It is possible to write more than 250 words during the time allocated for the task 2 essay, however, you should be careful you do not run out of time and find that you cannot write a conclusion, or check over your work.
Test Instructions
On the writing test paper, the instructions will look something like this below (Taken from the British Council IELTS) >
The highlighted sections show you that the instructions state clearly that at least 150 words are required for Task 1 and at least 250 words are required for Task 2.
The question examples below are taken from a free resource available on The British Council’s IELTS page. Take a look and download the free practice papers.
As you can see below, the highlighted section shows you that you have to write at least 150 words in Task 1.
TIP: Plan your work before you start to write, to make sure that all of the information you write in your essay is relevant. Do not write and write about anything and everything and go off-topic. It is more than possible to write a 250-word essay that is concise and to the point.
TIP: Check your word count during your IELTS essay preparation. Count the words (or if you are typing using the word count option) and see how many you are producing in 40 minutes for task 2 and 20 minutes for task 1.
TIP: Words that are hyphenated like in-depth or part-time will be counted as one word. prepositions like in, of, on and articles like the, a, at will all be counted. Punctuation, like commas, semi-colons and full stops (periods) will not be counted.
TIP: Practice writing your essay answers on the official writing answer sheet. This will allow you to practice counting your words to see how many you get in the time period allowed. You should aim to exceed the word count slightly so that you are sure you have met the minimum requirements.
Comprehensive guide covering essential IELTS preparation strategies and techniques to help you achieve your target band score.
Originally published December 2017. Last reviewed 3 July 2026.
In this post, we will look at how to write relevant examples to support your main points in the writing task 2 essay. Being able to write strong examples is important because it shows the examiner that you can logically organise your ideas and support your points with evidence.
In the main body paragraphs, you want to show the examiner that you can write about your ideas, explain them and support them with examples that are relevant, if you do this, you will gain marks for task achievement and coherence.
For a band score 8 in the task achievement section, the marking criteria states ‘presents a well-developed response to the question with relevant, extended and supported ideas’. For a band 9, it says ‘presents a fully developed position in answer to the question with relevant, fully extended and well-supported ideas’.
Why does my essay need to have relevant examples?
As a recap here is what your main body paragraph structure should look like for a high score >
Your main body paragraphs should have 3 main sentences >
Introduce the topic
Explain/give detail
Example
Introduce the topic
Start the paragraph by introducing the topic. This is where you need to have a topic sentence that introduces the examiner to the main idea of the paragraph.
Explain/give detail
The next sentence(s) should explain the topic, going into detail. This gives some background information related to the main idea of the paragraph. It explains the idea, telling the examiner how it is relevant to the question.
Example
The third part of your main body paragraph should give an example to support your main points. The example you give could be something from your own experience or made up – it is ok to make up something as the examiners will not fact check your information. They want to see your ability to use English at a certain level. You could make up an example from a report, journal, newspaper or University study to support your view.
How Do I think of Relevant Examples?
When you are trying to think of relevant examples, you can use your own personal experiences, or information from something you have seen or read about. If you really can’t think of anything, then you are allowed to make one up. The examiners will not check the facts that you present in your examples, as they want to see that you can support your main ideas well and that you have a high level of written English.
When writing relevantexamples you can use one of the following >
1. A University Study
You can make up a fictional study from a University in your country or city. If you want you can even use a study from a famous University, like Harvard, Cambridge or Oxford in the UK. These types of examples are great for supporting points about education, students or children.
Example
For example, Cambridge University in the UK surveyed over 500 students in 2017 and reported that over 65% had completed a gap year before starting their chosen course.
2. A Newspaper Report
Another way of writing a relevant example is to make up some information from a newspaper report or article. This may even be loosely based on something you have read in the news or seen online.
Example
For instance, according to an article published in The New York Times in 2016, a survey of people who work online, from home in the state of New York showed that 24% of people said they had developed depression.
3. Statistics from The Police
If you are writing an example for a crime or punishment related question you could include statistics from the police or government.
Example
For example, in some states in the USA, there are tough sanctions in place for criminals, including death by lethal injection. In 2014, the Texas State Police Department reported that up to 65% of criminals who were incarcerated for high-level crimes (murder, manslaughter) received the lethal injection.
4. Statistics from A Health Organisation
If you are writing an example for a health-related question you could include statistics from a health organisation like The WHO (World Health Organisation), the NHS in the UK or a private organisation like BUPA. Think of places from your own country that you could write about.
Example
For instance, the NHS in the UK regularly hold talks in schools for both parents and students to educate communities on how to have a balanced diet. They also promote proper exercise, involvement in sports, and having an active lifestyle. As a result of this program, in some areas, they saw a decrease in the number of overweight health issues.
5. Data from a Tech Company
If you are writing an example for a technology or communication-related question you could include statistics from a tech company.
Example
For example, in 2015 Google allowed senior engineers to work remotely, using flexible hours for those who travel a lot or have the need to work with little interruptions. This increased productivity to over 70% as the senior members could work seamlessly without any delays.
6. A Documentary
Another way of writing a relevant example is to make up some information from a documentary you have seen.
Example
For example, a documentary by Channel 4 in 2016 showed that the most obese populations were situated in underdeveloped nations, like Venezuela, where people admitted to finding it difficult to eat a balanced and healthy diet and had no nutritional education.
7. Your Own Experience
You can also include examples that display your own experiences in relation to the question. You should avoid using personal pronouns in the essay, but in this example, where you are writing about your own experience it is acceptable.
Example
For instance, In my experience, I know that in Romania, it is common practice for graduates from state-funded university courses to work in areas where their services are needed for a minimum of two years before they are able to apply to work abroad.
Make Your Examples Specific
You need to make sure that your examples are specific as this gives your point more authenticity. If your point is too general, then you will not be supporting your main idea enough for a high band score.
Look at these examples below >
Bad Example
For example, many students have a gap year before starting their chosen course.
Good Example
For example, Cambridge University in the UK surveyed over 500 students in 2017 and reported that over 65% had completed a gap year before starting their chosen course.
Feedback
You can see in the bad example that the example is not developed enough and gives general information to the reader. It tells you that many students have a gap year before starting University, but that is all of the information given.
The good example gives you specific data related to the main idea. There is a time (2017) how many students were asked (500) and the percentage of how many had a gap year (65%). This example gives more authenticity to the answer and provides an academic example. This is the type of answer that will fully support your main idea in the paragraph, which will score higher in the marking criteria.
You can make your example specific by adding the following >
Introduce the example with a cohesive device – For exampl/For instance
Include a percentage (if you are giving the results of a survey)
We hope you found this post useful in helping you to study for the IELTS Test. If you have any questions please let us know in the comments below or on the Facebook page.
The best way to keep up to date with posts like this is to like us on Facebook, then follow us on Instagram and Pinterest.
If you need help preparing for the IELTS Test, join the IELTS Achieve Academy and see how we can assist you to achieve your desired band score. We offer an essay correction service, mock exams and online courses.
Step-by-step guide to answering this type of IELTS Writing Task 1 question. Covers structure, key language, and band-scoring criteria.
Originally published December 2017. Last reviewed 3 July 2026.
In this post, we will look at how to write IELTS writing task 2 main body paragraphs. Being able to write strong main body paragraphs in your task 2 essay is important because it shows the examiner that you can logically organise your ideas and support your points with evidence.
In the main body paragraphs, you want to show the examiner that you can write about your ideas, explain them and support them with examples that are relevant, if you do this, you will gain marks for coherence. You should also make sure your writing is following a formal style as this is an academic essay.
If you would like to purchase a 14 page PDF download that is easy to read and print out please take a look at the bookshop >
Main Body Paragraph Structure
By learning a structure for your main body paragraphs and practising it over and over with many questions, you will be able to write one quickly about any topic.
Your main body paragraphs should have 3 main sentences >
Introduce the topic
Explain/give detail
Example
Introduce the topic
Start the paragraph by introducing the topic. This is where you need to have a topic sentence that introduces the examiner to the main idea of the paragraph.
Explain/give detail
The next sentence(s) should explain the topic, going into detail. This gives some background information related to the main idea of the paragraph. It explains the idea, telling the examiner how it is relevant to the question.
Example
The third part of your main body paragraph should give an example to support your main points. The example you give could be something from your own experience or made up – it is ok to make up something as the examiners will not fact check your information. They want to see your ability to use English at a certain level. You could make up an example from a report, journal, newspaper or University study to support your view.
Examples
Here are some example main body paragraphs written for common question types. Please take note of how they have been written and structured.
Cause/Effect Essay
Question
In current society, many people are struggling with obesity. What is the main cause of this? What are the effects?
Main Body Paragraph 1
Firstly, obesity is caused by many factors in modern society, including the easy availability of unhealthy food. When a bad diet is matched with a sedentary lifestyle, weight gain is inevitable, since eating large portions of food that is mainly processed, high in salt, sugar and filled with chemicals, the body gains weight fast. For example, a documentary by Channel 4 in 2016 showed that the most obese populations were situated in underdeveloped nations, like Venezuela, where people admitted to finding it difficult to eat a balanced and healthy diet and had no nutritional education.
Main Body Paragraph 2
Secondly, the effect that immense weight gain can have on a person, is that they will likely develop health issues, like diabetes or heart disease. As the body becomes larger, the metabolism slows down, so that the body is more likely to get a chronic illness. This is impacting on health services around the world, as hospitals are seeing an increased demand to care for obese patients. For instance, The NHS in the UK has admitted to spending around 16 billion per year on obese related diseases like diabetes. UK newspaper The Telegraph reported in 2016 that more money is spent on treating obesity in the UK than on staffing the police force and fire service.
Feedback
The main body paragraphs both have the same structure, the first sentence introduces the topic, next there is an explanation and lastly, there is an example given to support the point. The paragraphs also contain complex sentences, cohesive devices and high-level vocabulary.
Many people in society believe that having fixed punishments for all crimes is a more efficient way of dealing with criminals in the justice system.
What are the advantages and disadvantages of having a fixed punishment?
Main Body Paragraph 1
On the one hand, the main advantage of having a standardised punishment system could lead to a downward trend in crime, as the system would serve as a deterrent. This would allow the courts to easily hand out justice to all criminals, in order to make the judiciary system more powerful. For example, in some states in the USA, there are tough sanctions in place for criminals, including death by lethal injection. In 2014, the New York Times reported that up to 65% of criminals who were incarcerated for high-level crimes (murder, manslaughter) received the lethal injection.
Main Body Paragraph 2
On the other hand, the primary disadvantage of having fixed punishments is that people who have committed low-level crimes may also be given harsh sentences, in the same way as those who have been sentenced for high-level crimes. This may make the system unjust, as the punishment should befit the crime. For instance, a person who may have acted in self-defence should have their case heard in full, before being given a punishment befitting of someone who has been part of a violent act.
Feedback
The main body paragraphs both have the same structure, the first sentence introduces the topic, next there is an explanation and lastly, there is an example given to support the point. The paragraphs also contain complex sentences, cohesive devices and high-level vocabulary.
Due to poorer countries experiencing a ‘brain drain’ they are seeing many professionals, such as doctors and teachers, leaving to work in more developed countries.
What problems does this cause? What solutions can be suggested to deal with this problem?
Main Body Paragraph 1
The foremost problem with skilled professionals, such as doctors and teachers leaving is that it deprives the country of people who are necessary to its survival. A shortage of doctors in hospitals could lead to them being severely understaffed, even though they have the trained doctors and nurses who are local and willing to work. In addition, some academic institutions will also suffer, with a lack of skilled teachers in highly desirable subjects, like maths, science and languages. Many professionals desire better pay and working conditions, leaving in search of a better lifestyle so that they can earn a higher salary. For example, a study from Cambridge University showed that in Romania in 2014, 75% of graduates had applied to work in the UK and the USA.
Main Body Paragraph 2
A possible solution to this problem is for skilled professionals to enter into mandatory service in their origin country, before being able to migrate. Those who earn their qualifications from state universities should have to work in service to their country for a set amount of time, even though they are ready for the wider workplace. This would address the shortage of workers in hospitals and schools, meanwhile gaining experience, in order to give something back to their community and country. For instance, in Romania, it is common practice for graduates from state-funded university courses to work in areas where their services are needed for a minimum of two years before they are able to apply to work abroad.
Feedback
The main body paragraphs both have the same structure, the first sentence introduces the topic, next there is an explanation and lastly, there is an example given to support the point. The paragraphs also contain complex sentences, cohesive devices and high-level vocabulary.
Some people think that developments involving the internet have brought people closer together while others think that people and communities have become more isolated.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Main Body Paragraph 1
Firstly, during the last two decades, there have been many tech developments and advancements, bringing convenience to all. One significant attribute of this modernization is the internet, while this technology has made our lives more convenient in many aspects, including our approach to communication. In the past, we only used mail or the telephone to send our messages across the globe, whereas today, the internet allows us to reach out to almost everyone in just a few seconds. The inconvenience of long distances is eliminated as we can talk and even see distant friends or relatives for an unlimited time. For example, the internet connects people whose relatives or families are abroad, through Facebook, Twitter or Skype anytime and anywhere.
Main Body Paragraph 2
Secondly, this technological development has its drawbacks, as it has been observed that some individuals tend to spend a lot of their time surfing the internet or on different social networking sites. Communities meet online via private Facebook groups, instead of in a community hall to discuss matters, since this does not allow them to socialise physically with people, they isolate themselves in this virtual world. Both teenagers and adults use much of their time online and this does not allow them to develop their interpersonal skills. For instance, a study from 2015 by The Social Media Explorer saw that over 93% of teenagers aged 16-19 have a social media presence, with more than three social accounts per person.
Feedback
The main body paragraphs both have the same structure, the first sentence introduces the topic, next there is an explanation and lastly, there is an example given to support the point. The paragraphs also contain complex sentences, cohesive devices and high-level vocabulary.
Due to the growing number of overweight people in today’s society putting a strain on the healthcare system, some people think that the best way to deal with the problem is to offer more physical education lessons in the school curriculum.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Main Body Paragraph 1
On the one hand, I believe that the best way to fight health care problems is by utilising health education. By integrating physical education classes into the curriculum, impressionable young children and adults will be exposed to healthy lifestyle practices of sport and exercise, whereas they will also learn about teamwork and see their self-confidence grow. For example, at Westminster primary school in the UK, 10-minute exercise intervals were introduced between classes. The children must run laps around the playground before going to their next lesson. This formed part of a study by Cambridge University, where it reported that 85% of the children performed better on tests and obesity records were at an all-time low.
Main Body Paragraph 2
On the other hand, in my view having more physical education classes in the curriculum is not the only way to teach young people how to have a healthy lifestyle. The children should be educated how to balance exercise with a healthy diet, so that this could extend, not only to the students in the schools but also to the parents. For instance, the NHS in the UK regularly hold talks in schools for both parents and students to educate communities on how to have a balanced diet. They also promote proper exercise, involvement in sports, and having an active lifestyle. As a result of this program, in some areas, they saw a decrease in the number of overweight health issues.
Feedback
The main body paragraphs both have the same structure, the first sentence introduces the topic, next there is an explanation and lastly, there is an example given to support the point. The paragraphs also contain complex sentences, cohesive devices and high-level vocabulary.
Many employers are now offering their employees the option to work from home.As a result, employees will have much more flexible working hours in the future.
Is this a positive or negative development?
Main Body Paragraph 1
On the one hand, having the option to work from home, can have a positive impact on an employee’s schedule. This is especially so if the person has children or other dependants because working long hours is not always possible depending on your lifestyle. Therefore it allows the employee to manage their own schedule while ensuring that they maintain a work-life balance, working from wherever they are in the world. Having flexible working hours means that collecting children from school, spending time travelling and being able to attend non-work related appointments becomes much easier. For example, Google allows senior engineers to work remotely, using flexible hours for those who travel a lot or have the need to work with little interruptions.
Main Body Paragraph 2
On the other hand, employees can become isolated from the company and/or co-workers when not active in the office environment. When working away from the office, a worker may feel removed from colleagues and the day to day issues that arise from that environment. Working for hours each day without face to face contact with co-workers and management can seriously impact a person’s mental health, leading to frustration, depression and burnout. For instance, according to an article published in The New York Times in 2016, a survey of people who work online, from home in the state of New York showed that 24% of people said they had developed depression.
Feedback
The main body paragraphs both have the same structure, the first sentence introduces the topic, next there is an explanation and lastly, there is an example given to support the point. The paragraphs also contain complex sentences, cohesive devices and high-level vocabulary.
The arts, including art, music and theatre are considered to be important in society.
Do you think the arts still have a place amongst our modern lifestyles?
Should the arts be included in school programs?
Main Body Paragraph 1
Firstly, the creative arts, such as paintings, sculptures, music and theatre have a long and ardent history throughout the ages. They have grown and evolved with the times, appealing to new generations every year, in order to keep being a part of everyday life. People enjoy the arts, often as an escape from their lives, listening to music they enjoy, going to see a play with friends or visiting galleries and museums to see paintings, photography or sculptures. For example, a study from the New York Times in 2017 showed that over 75% of New Yorkers said that they regularly visited the cities art galleries, museums and theatres. A further 35% said that they donated money regularly to art societies, for the preservation of the collections, so they can continue for many years to come.
Main Body Paragraph 2
Secondly, many people develop a love for the arts early in life, when they are at school. In my opinion, I think that a range of arts subjects should be included in the school curriculum, as not all students are ‘left brained’ enjoying logical, core subjects like mathematics. Others are more ‘right brained’ where they enjoy being creative, whether that is in writing, painting or making music. Children should be encouraged to find their talents at school and develop them for their own enjoyment and advancement. For instance, St. Cuthberts school in the north of England dedicated 40% of the curriculum of creative subjects, including fine art, pottery, music, drama and dance. Those subjects proved to enhance school results by over 25% in 2017.
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The main body paragraphs both have the same structure, the first sentence introduces the topic, next there is an explanation and lastly, there is an example given to support the point. The paragraphs also contain complex sentences, cohesive devices and high-level vocabulary.
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