⚡ TL;DR
A detailed guide to this IELTS Writing Task 2 essay type, with structure templates, useful vocabulary, and techniques to achieve Band 7+.
Originally published October 2017. Last reviewed 3 July 2026.
In this post, you will be able to view an essay example from a past student, with the corrections and feedback highlighted in red.
Most of the students studying for the IELTS Test have said they find the IELTS Writing Tasks difficult. I have corrected hundreds of task 1 and 2 essays on various topics, giving estimated band scores and detailed feedback. There are also suggestions on how to improve for a higher band score. Take a look at this student essay example and see how it compares to your own writing.
Writing Task 2 Question
“Childhood obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries. Explain the main causes and effects of this problem, and suggest some possible solutions.”
Here is the task 2 essay before corrections >>
Here is the task 2 essay with corrections, suggestions, feedback and an estimated band score >>
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What Band 4.5 Means for Task 2
Band 4.5 in IELTS Writing Task 2 reflects limited competence across the four assessment criteria. Understanding these criteria helps you identify exactly what to improve.
Task Response at Band 4.5
The response only partially addresses the task. The position may be unclear, and main ideas are difficult to identify or are not sufficiently developed.
Coherence and Cohesion at Band 4.5
Ideas are not clearly organised. Paragraphing may be absent or confusing. Cohesive devices are limited or repetitive.
How to Improve Beyond Band 4.5
- Plan before writing: Spend 5 minutes outlining your position, main ideas, and supporting points.
- Develop your ideas more: Each body paragraph should have a clear topic sentence, explanation, example, and link back to the question.
- Proofread: Reserve 2-3 minutes at the end to check for grammar errors, spelling mistakes, and unclear sentences.
- Practise under timed conditions: Write complete essays in 40 minutes to build speed and confidence.
Originally published on IELTS Achieve. Last reviewed 3 July 2026.